In my book, there is a chapter called Unclenching My Hands. I just posted this chapter on YouTube as a video. I believe it’s more relevant now because of our given situation with Covid-19. I have started to unclench my hands again as a form of worship and a gesture to let go of my fears and anxiety and to make a statement that I trust in God.
We all have different fears. Some may be afraid of catching the virus or for their family members who are working in health-care and essential services. Perhaps you’ve been laid off and worried about how to provide for your family. The uncertainly is very nerve wracking.
I, too, have similar fears except I have another concern. Just as many other people with disabilities, I rely on care-givers. Because this is part-time employment, many care attendants work at several places. Given the Covid-19 situation, two of my attendants had to stop working with me as they work in a long-term care facility and in a hospital. They can only work in one place for the time being as a preventative measure.
In my case, one of my former attendant is trying her best to fill in while attending classes on-line. Fortunately, I also have my mother who is staying with me. However, she is older and can’t help with everything. This is why I started unclenching my hands again as I feel really vulnerable not being able to be more self reliant. I am used to this, it’s not new for me. It comes with the territory of having to rely on other people.
Now you may feel just as vulnerable but under different circumstances. My advice to you is to remember how God has taken care of you in the past, remember His grace, remember His fatherly love and how he has always got your back. This is what gets me through all the difficult times as I open my palms to the Holy Spirit, I re-affirm my confidence in Him. I hope you join me with your own gesture of letting God know you trust Him.